Hamster update: (The honeymoon is over)

Let me begin with this…
I am fulfilling my end of the bargain. I signed the papers promising to take care of the ‘animal companions’, (see the April 29 blog for more info, then scroll back up) but it didn’t say that I had to like them. I provide sustenance, shelter, and creature comforts, but nowhere does it say that I have to like them.… Here’s the thing, I feel like I have been defrauded because they are not companions at all! A companion is a friend, and these things ain't nor friends o' mine! I have issues with our borders, to be sure. Here’s a short (but growing) list…

a) My daughter is afraid that they’ll bite her, so she won’t pick them up. This of course defeats the entire purpose of having these things. She went so far as to ask if she could have a gecko last night. I told her no, she’s got to play out the string with the rodents..
b) The so called ‘silent exercise wheel’ is anything but. It is so noisy that the cage has to be kept in the living room so that my child can sleep, since these crazed nocturnal critters run all night long. This of course means that the living room is noisy, all evening, and I have to turn the TV up loud to hear it over the din..
c) THEY SMELL! (actually it’s not them of course, it’s their feces) and can we talk about that?
d) The Feces… Hamsters have incredibly short digestive tracts, but very large appetites. This is of course, a recipe for disaster in an enclosed space.
e) Cream (the lazier one) crams so much food into her jaw pouches that she cannot fit into other areas of the cage(Oh I'm sorry, Habitat).
My one amusement is watching this vain activity. It reminds me of some people I know… We are so often the cause of our own discomfort, and difficulties but unwilling to make the changes necessary, because it might mean letting go... (Wait, That's a WORD)
f) I have broken down their days into the following schedule:
· Eat, climb, drink, run, dump, pee, eat, dump, run, drink, nap, eat, pee, run, dump, eat, pee, drink, run, dump, sleep (most times right where they took the dump)

I have had to pick feces out of fur. (This is, of course, a ‘Daddy only’ job). They feign interest in me when I approach the cage. I am aware that this is only because they think that I have food. I am not fooled by these stupid mammals. Not fooled at all…
And yet, I continue to kill the mice… What is wrong here?

Oh, and by the way, Here's some video of Powersurge Worship Band from our recent trip to Germany. Yes I am singing and playing drums. Yes that is what I look like.
The song is 'His Name' by Philip Bardowell. Enjoy


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